Killing Myself
As the French surrealist poet Paul Valéry once put so perfectly:
"A poem is never finished; it is only abandoned."
Witness an abandoned song I recorded in one take on 20 February 2008:
[Note: friends who subscribe to my blogs by e-mail may need to click the permalink at the bottom of their page to view this video.]
I originally thought of this as a sort of sequel to "Forever's Haunting Me" (you may click here to view and hear that song). So although I wrote the two pieces in different keys ("Killing Myself" in A-minor and "Forever's Haunting Me" in C-minor), there are some stylistic similarities.
Here are my lyrics, if anyone is interested:
I'm killing myself slowly
Watching time dragging past
If I was killing myself only
I'd do it fast.
But isn't love what it is?
Whether it's mine, yours, hers or his
We've got no business tearing it down
No business tearing it down.
Ripples in an ocean stir the atmosphere above
Sunset on devotion knocks the wind from the sails of love
Who am I to falter,
A god among mere men?
Still I'm lying on your altar,
Sacrificed for what you call vice again.
But isn't love what it is?
Whether mine, yours, hers or his
We've got no business tearing it down
But if love ain't what it is
Then why the hell are we in this?
We've got no business sticking around
When there's no love in town
And we're stuck in the ground
Just floundering 'round.
But if love can be found
Anywhere in this town
We've no business tearing it down.
I'm killing myself slowly
Watching time dragging past
If I was killing myself only
I'd do it fast.
"A poem is never finished; it is only abandoned."
Witness an abandoned song I recorded in one take on 20 February 2008:
[Note: friends who subscribe to my blogs by e-mail may need to click the permalink at the bottom of their page to view this video.]
I originally thought of this as a sort of sequel to "Forever's Haunting Me" (you may click here to view and hear that song). So although I wrote the two pieces in different keys ("Killing Myself" in A-minor and "Forever's Haunting Me" in C-minor), there are some stylistic similarities.
Here are my lyrics, if anyone is interested:
I'm killing myself slowly
Watching time dragging past
If I was killing myself only
I'd do it fast.
But isn't love what it is?
Whether it's mine, yours, hers or his
We've got no business tearing it down
No business tearing it down.
Ripples in an ocean stir the atmosphere above
Sunset on devotion knocks the wind from the sails of love
Who am I to falter,
A god among mere men?
Still I'm lying on your altar,
Sacrificed for what you call vice again.
But isn't love what it is?
Whether mine, yours, hers or his
We've got no business tearing it down
But if love ain't what it is
Then why the hell are we in this?
We've got no business sticking around
When there's no love in town
And we're stuck in the ground
Just floundering 'round.
But if love can be found
Anywhere in this town
We've no business tearing it down.
I'm killing myself slowly
Watching time dragging past
If I was killing myself only
I'd do it fast.
Love it.. Nice job.
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Thank you, my kind friend!
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The Minister sends you his blessings, my child... what a beautiful, haunting piece, full of pathos and sorrow. The third stanza is especially evocative, and the entire lyric structure is... well, heavenly. You are truly talented, and the Church thanks you for sharing this song with us.
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You're too kind, my friend....
I feel it is, like the sentiment that spawned it, less than perfect.
But such is the stuff of reality.
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WOW!!
I love it!
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Thank you, Angela!
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i think i heard the door shut at the end.
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'Twould be fitting.
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indeed.
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Beautiful, JC.......just absolutely haunting. LOVE IT
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thanks, barbie! I appreciate the kind feedback...
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John my man that is a great song, i get a different feeling from it. it moves me to do more in life and to help the love evolve into something more, faith and trust. absolutely amazing sir. i love it!
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I'm grateful for your comment and your friendship, Josh!
Means a lot to me....
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As i am of your comments and friendship, you motivate me to blog and write more. so thank you!
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You're welcome, Josh.
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This is a strong lyric and I love the music as much as I love you for writing this. There is a lot of agape in this poetry and never ending unselfish love.
Yes, all of us are killing ourselves slowly but love is eternal and never
ends unless we kill it. Peace, joy,
health and love to you and all who love
each other. Elena
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You are a man of many talents and gifts to share....my friend.
I have a lot to learn from you about pushing my own limits of creativity now...
Thanks for being a fine example to follow.
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Thank you very much, Chris. I feel fortunate to have such fine friends.
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Don't wait another whole year to share your talents in music and poetry with us.
You are an inspiration to all.
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I'm grateful you feel that way!
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Very nice, John. I love listening to you.
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Thank you so much, Terese!
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You have an incredibly powerful voice. I really enjoyed the introduction as well as the song.
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I appreciate it, Tara! I don't feel my voice is powerful... but I did feel powerful emotions when writing and singing that. If the emotion came through, then I consider it a sucess despite its flaws.
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I like the quotation.
Didn't know you were so good on that kind of keyboard
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LOL... thanks, Jens! I'm a little rusty. But one of my unofficial resolutions this year is to play/practice more.
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Very haunting - you have talent! We need SOOOOOOOOOO much more love in the world yet we are all too freaked out to tell anyone outside of immediate family, that we love them. SOOOOOOOO in case no-one has said it to you lately, "Luv ya" J.
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Thank you so much, Jane! Coming from a fellow musician, that means a lot. And you may consider yourself loved back (platonically, of course... lol). By the way, I "pimped" your excellent blog on my Favorites page.
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Still loving your voice. I find a lot of truth in your ideas, and you express them with words and music perfectly. You mentioned that it nags at you when something is left unfinished. Something unfinished is nagging me too.
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Thank you, Tara!
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So sad.
Hugs,
Suzette
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Thanks, Suze!
I didn't really start playing piano in earnest until I was about 30 - though I had a few lessons much earlier.
Played cornet in school, and can play guitar and bass a little bit....
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