Offending Past and Present
Don't feel much like writing today....
Was a good day, a wonderful day... still is, in its way. But I don't feel right about enjoying it.
I just got a letter from my friend Jim (not his real name). Good guy... one of the genuine nice guys in this world. I've known him to be honest to a fault, even when it might cause him harm. Hard worker, educated, perhaps the person I trust most in the whole world... and some of my best work was done with him collaborating.
He got out of prison some time before I did. Has held down a good job, been doing a lot of good in the world.... I don't want to expose his identity, though.
So why am I unhappy about getting his letter?
It came from prison. Yes, "Jim" is back in prison - four and a half years into his five-year "parole." Why? He didn't commit a crime. He didn't steal from or otherwise harm anybody. Wasn't irresponsible, didn't shun the law, has in fact been the ultimate clean-cut kid since his release....
So why's he back in jail (for six to nine months)?
There are a lot of rules that so-called "sex offenders" are subject to while on parole or probation (bear in mind that folks have been labeled "sex offenders" in Ohio for crimes as minor as kissing a teenager's foot in public after losing a bet - or getting caught pissing behind a dumpster). While I was on parole from 2004 to 2006, some of the rules I had to follow (despite none of them having anything to do with my alleged crime) included: I couldn't own or use a digital camera, couldn't be on the internet, couldn't travel out-of-state without permission, couldn't drink a beer, couldn't enter any establishment that served liquor, couldn't date, get married or have sex (including with my wife) without my parole officer's permission.... You get the idea.
While on probation, Jim dated someone for a couple of years. A year or two after that relationship ended, the person Jim dated (a consenting adult) learned that Jim had been in prison before they met. Turns out there is another rule I haven't mentioned: couldn't have a "relationship" with anyone without first telling them about "your offending past."
Apparently Jim never told his ex that he was an ex-convict. That is a violation of his parole. Now he's separated from his family, his thriving business will struggle because he can't work - and he's spending all summer and fall in a ten-by-twelve foot cell because he failed to tell someone he'd been in prison.
Seems like an odd rule to me.... "Your offending past" is vague. Would my DUI in 1991 count? Or the time I passed gas loudly during the pastor's sermon at age fifteen? Some folks consider my use of the word fuck offensive. Or my criticism of George Bush.... Or the fact that I voted for Bush senior in 1988 (hell, even I find that one offensive)....
Sure, we know what the rule means. But when do you tell someone? Even if you say, "Hey, I'm an ex-convict" ten minutes into your first date, you've broken the rule for the first ten minutes. And how do they define "relationship"? Sex is a form of relationship. So is friendship or being a neighbor. I have "relationships" in a general sense with folks who read my blog, many of whom I've never met in person.
Merriam-Webster says a relationship is any "state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings." Buying a can of soda is a form of dealing. So should Jim tell the clerk at 7/11 that he's an ex-convict before handing over any money?
We're talking about a consensual relationship between adults. There was no abuse involved. While Jim has been on probation for four and a half years, he has not commited a crime - hasn't even exceeded the speed limit driving. And he's paid for anything done in the distant past.
Jim was due to be off probation by Christmas. Now he may be in prison for Christmas. This is where tens of thousands of our tax dollars are going? And he's not the only one....
At least he's kept a sense of humor. He wrote at the top of his letter: WORST SUMMER CAMP EV - ER!!
Was a good day, a wonderful day... still is, in its way. But I don't feel right about enjoying it.
I just got a letter from my friend Jim (not his real name). Good guy... one of the genuine nice guys in this world. I've known him to be honest to a fault, even when it might cause him harm. Hard worker, educated, perhaps the person I trust most in the whole world... and some of my best work was done with him collaborating.
He got out of prison some time before I did. Has held down a good job, been doing a lot of good in the world.... I don't want to expose his identity, though.
So why am I unhappy about getting his letter?
It came from prison. Yes, "Jim" is back in prison - four and a half years into his five-year "parole." Why? He didn't commit a crime. He didn't steal from or otherwise harm anybody. Wasn't irresponsible, didn't shun the law, has in fact been the ultimate clean-cut kid since his release....
So why's he back in jail (for six to nine months)?
There are a lot of rules that so-called "sex offenders" are subject to while on parole or probation (bear in mind that folks have been labeled "sex offenders" in Ohio for crimes as minor as kissing a teenager's foot in public after losing a bet - or getting caught pissing behind a dumpster). While I was on parole from 2004 to 2006, some of the rules I had to follow (despite none of them having anything to do with my alleged crime) included: I couldn't own or use a digital camera, couldn't be on the internet, couldn't travel out-of-state without permission, couldn't drink a beer, couldn't enter any establishment that served liquor, couldn't date, get married or have sex (including with my wife) without my parole officer's permission.... You get the idea.
While on probation, Jim dated someone for a couple of years. A year or two after that relationship ended, the person Jim dated (a consenting adult) learned that Jim had been in prison before they met. Turns out there is another rule I haven't mentioned: couldn't have a "relationship" with anyone without first telling them about "your offending past."
Apparently Jim never told his ex that he was an ex-convict. That is a violation of his parole. Now he's separated from his family, his thriving business will struggle because he can't work - and he's spending all summer and fall in a ten-by-twelve foot cell because he failed to tell someone he'd been in prison.
Seems like an odd rule to me.... "Your offending past" is vague. Would my DUI in 1991 count? Or the time I passed gas loudly during the pastor's sermon at age fifteen? Some folks consider my use of the word fuck offensive. Or my criticism of George Bush.... Or the fact that I voted for Bush senior in 1988 (hell, even I find that one offensive)....
Sure, we know what the rule means. But when do you tell someone? Even if you say, "Hey, I'm an ex-convict" ten minutes into your first date, you've broken the rule for the first ten minutes. And how do they define "relationship"? Sex is a form of relationship. So is friendship or being a neighbor. I have "relationships" in a general sense with folks who read my blog, many of whom I've never met in person.
Merriam-Webster says a relationship is any "state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings." Buying a can of soda is a form of dealing. So should Jim tell the clerk at 7/11 that he's an ex-convict before handing over any money?
We're talking about a consensual relationship between adults. There was no abuse involved. While Jim has been on probation for four and a half years, he has not commited a crime - hasn't even exceeded the speed limit driving. And he's paid for anything done in the distant past.
Jim was due to be off probation by Christmas. Now he may be in prison for Christmas. This is where tens of thousands of our tax dollars are going? And he's not the only one....
At least he's kept a sense of humor. He wrote at the top of his letter: WORST SUMMER CAMP EV - ER!!
I always get pissed when I hear about the sex offender laws. In some states an 18 year old can be classified as a sex offender for having sex with a 16 year old. That can be a junior in high school sleeping with a senior in high school. Bullshit if you ask me.
My question is did the ex call the PO? I mean, how would the parole officer know after the relationship had ended?
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Thanks, Valerie! I'm grateful you stopped by and shared.
Yes, the ex called the P.O. - apparently after getting frustrated because Jim didn't want to get back together.
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This is incredible and outrageous. I'm so sorry for the fella.
How crazy that they have so much control over such personal things AFTER someone's served time!
It's impossible to live in the modern world as a professional without the internet.
I think drug laws exist solely to oppress people, have something over them in case they want to lock up the free-thinkers. & I think sex crime punishments are way too harsh.
Meanwhile the big crime in this country is NOT being punished: crime against the haves perpetrated on the have-nots. The media uses this other stuff to divert our attention & make us our own oppressors.
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god lady, i wish i was as articulate as you are. this is pretty much what i would have wanted to say if i could.
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I was just thinking today when reading some of your Cleveland Poetics blog comments that you are darned articulate.
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Oops - thought JC had written this - but thank you so much Meribeth - that's really sweet of you.
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Thank you, Meribeth and Lady!
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whew! i was worried. i'm been to cleveland poetics, but couldn't remember leaving a blog comment there.
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Yeah, I'm wondering how all that works.
How crazy that they can screw with you after you've served your time. That bothers me.
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Especially when he's spent four and a half years showing that he's a good citizen and no threat to anyone....
Enforcing rules is one thing. But with six to nine months in prison?
Thanks, Terese.
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So if you break one of these rules and no one knows your "ok" and if not... your ass is grass??? Some one would have had to have turned him in... our no one would have cared or known. THat sucks... And your thrown in prison for something that is not a crime?? Having a "relationship" as you said, is not a crime... whether you are in or out of prison , convicted or not.
Strange... I wonder if they have such "inquisitorial" rules for regular felons... I imagine not.
The whole thing sucks!! Not suprised your not in a great mood over it...
Thanks for posting this.. I along with a lot of your other readers are unaware of all these "rules"... thanks for opening our eyes and informing us.
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Thanks, Chris.
I didn't mention this in the blog because it's largely beside the point. But I will color in the picture a bit now, because it might be interesting to see if it alters folks' perceptions and opinions.
Notice I never mentioned a woman. Jim is gay. The ex is a full grown man who used Jim thoroughly. The ex got mad when Jim wouldn't get back with him and refused to continue to support him, give him loans, et cetera. The ex seems to have been of this mind: "If I can't have Jim, I'll make sure no one else can." So when Jim finally said "Leave me alone and quit stalking me," the ex called the parole officer.
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Hi John, I'm sorry for what Jim is going through. If I had to guess when the right time to tell someone that I was an ex-convict, I would have to say when we felt the relationship got serious. I can't believe that the courts would do something this petty.
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Thanks, Lysa.
"When we felt the relationship got serious" sounds good... but I suspect that a difficulty in defining "serious" might lead to more problems. Not everyone agrees on what "serious" is.
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this poem is about doing time
[IMG]http://i216.photobucket.com/albums/cc48/charlaxici/Tuesday/CharlaXLenny.jpg[/IMG]
CharlaXTheme#35
CharlaXTitles#35
Questing
http://poetrypoem.com/cgi-bin/index.pl?poemnumber=931270&sitename=charlaxici&poemoffset=0&displaypoem=t&item=poetry
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its a picture eye changed on PAINT program on my #3 million $ Dell free lieberry computor its lenny bruce
[IMG]http://i216.photobucket.com/albums/cc48/charlaxici/Tuesday/CharlaXLenny.jpg[/IMG]
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its a picture eye changed on PAINT program on my #3 million $ Dell free lieberry computor its lenny bruce
http://i216.photobucket.com/albums/cc48/charlaxici/Tuesday/CharlaXLenny.jpg
here is the direct link
aint photobucket cool
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I'm digging it, Charles. Wanna call it Lenny Bruised....
Thanks for sharing!
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This is a catch 22. She should of asked and he should of offered the info.
But, what I want to know is who told the
parole officer?
This is why three-somes don't work..
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Thanks, HU! The ex called the P.O.
Good thing I only had to serve two years on parole, as opposed to Jim's five.... Otherwise I wouldn't be able to blog, take pictures, send an e-mail, et cetera until 2009. And not a single soul would be safer than they are already are.
The worst I might do is blog them to death.
I suspect the real rapists and molesters are going to rape and molest whether you make them tell people they were in prison - or say they can't be on the internet - or forbid them from having a camera - or not.
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I am sorry to hear about your friend. A person who is 18 and someone that is 16 or 17 for me is not a sex offender. If there is no forceable sex involved how can they accuse someone for this. I am 50 and my husband is 54. Does this mean years ago when we were dating and he was 3 years older than I, he could of been a sex offender. NO! Here we have real sex offenders out there and they use a catch all for everything. I think this is unfair. I am sorry
Lori
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Thank you very much, Lori!
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Hello John,
I am going to be the devil's advocate for a bit.
Sex offenders, guilty or innocent are told the rules.
Rules are rules. There is a reason these rules are set. So the person you are in a "relationship" with knows what she/he is dealing with BEFORE you end up having children, starting a life, etc.. Even if it has to deal with other offenses.
Though Merriam-Webster says a relationship is any "state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings" WE know relationship as "A state of connectedness between people (especially an emotional connection)" and you do NOT have an emotional connection with the man who works at 7/11.
Right or wrong, Guilty or innocent, you are set RULES. you must abide by these rules or there will be consequenses fair or unfair.
Look at it this way, if you were a 3 to 12 year old girl who has been molested, raped or killed, should we not give the person who did this rules? Should we just let him walk away and do it again and again and again.
I've watched the Steve Wilkos show and I know from watching that sex offenders will not admit they did it. they will dig themselves in a hole and be buried alive before they let people know the truth. I know it's hard to admit we were wrong but right OR wrong, there are RULES!! If you have nothing to worry about, if you really arent guilty, why hide it? why hide you were in prison if you know in your heart you didn't do it?!
And since you're here telling us what a "good guy" he is.. is he truly innocent or is he guilty? You failed to mention that. Why didn't he mention this early on in the relationship? What was he afraid of? That someone besides him, the little girl and the police would find out that he was a creep? Or was he really innocent and didnt want to give the wrong impression?
I am a bit concerned about all the RULES you seem to be against. We have to have these rules to keep our children safe.
Come on John, you know for a fact that you don't need to tell someone within the first 10 minutes of meeting them, but for 1 to 2 years? That's a little long to hide the truth of being in prison at least, especially when there are RULES! Rules that you seem to know alot about. Truthfully, I think you exaggerate some of these points. If you want people to answer you honestly, why twist up fine points of the rules that can help a rational understanding of what your friend is REALLY going through?
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You asked, "If you were a 3 to 12 year old girl who has been molested, raped or killed, should we not give the person who did this rules?" I never said we shouldn't give such a person rules. Some folks may need rules. But I'm speaking specifically of Jim. He did not rape, molest or kill anyone - and no one "3 to 12 years old" was part of the equation. I don't think what he did originally (and he never denied it) matters for the sake of this discussion. No one's saying he should or shouldn't have gone to prison the first time. But he paid his debt and is no threat. He's one of only two people from prison that I've invited into my home and would have no problem allowing around my grandchildren.
If I were him, I would have told the person. I do tell people. But when you first get out, it's hard to tell people. You fear rejection. You think no one will ever take the chance to know you. No one will ever give you a job. Doesn't mean you shouldn't tell people.... I think he should have. But he didn't. Does that make him deserve six to nine months in prison? Spending $30,000 to lock him up is doing nothing to protect children. I think the money could be better spent. And there are other ways to enforce such rules.
Yes, you know the rules - but you find them out after you get out and have served your time, if your parole officer tells you them at all (they don't always). I found out I wasn't allowed to use a camera or be on the internet two days after I came home. During those two days, I had done both, unaware of the rules, and I could have been sent back to prison for that. Never mind that keeping me from taking pictures of my mom's smile the day I came home after eleven years - and then emailing the pictures of me and her to my family out of state - had nothing to do with keeping children safe. Also, the rules didn't exist when you were sentenced and imprisoned. They were added later. Never mind that ex post facto punishment is unconstitutional - and the rules have actually been found by various studies to increase recidivism instead of decrease it. I agree - fair or not, if he knew the rule he should have obeyed it. If there's a rule that says "steal a dollar and we'll cut off your hand," you ought to obey it if you want to keep your hand. But if you don't, does that make the powers-that-be right to chop off your hand for stealing a dollar? The thief is wrong, but so is the chopper.
Although I respect your opinion and appreciate you being honest and playing devil's advocate, I believe you are wrong about at least one thing. You say, "sex offenders will not admit they did it. They will dig themselves in a hole and be buried alive before they let people know the truth." The ones on TV don't admit it, perhaps. But I spent several years attending rehabilitative programs with sex offenders - and I've heard at least a hundred guys admit exactly what they did. Some were very remorseful and some were not so much. Sometimes it made me sick to sit in the same room as them and hear it - and I would wish with all my heart that certain of those guys were never released from prison. But they didn't deny what they did.
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But I like the guy who makes my Diet Dr.Pepper Slurpies...at the 7/11 and I can feel the chills between us..!
I don't believe in volunteering any
info unless I am asked..and then I give
the full monte!! (And then "they" wished
they didn't ask! HA!
Therefore, rejection is saved and so are
feelings..
Does this make me a liar, or a rebel, against the grain?
Maybe. Maybe not.
But, past is past and if a person is
true to oneself, then all else follows.
Rules? Ah, they were made to be broken.
Some for spite, and some for good intentions...
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How do you know he didn't? Were you there? Can you read his mind? Or did you just take his word for it? To me there is no debt to be paid for raping a child or an adult. No amount of money or jail time can compensate what the victim went through. We have talked before. The laws are wrong in many cases. But we have to have a starting point to get all of this ended. I have done my research on rapist. And they don't just give it up.
Granted yes, some do admit to it. BECAUSE they were busted right out for it. But most do not. I could of went overboard with that statement. Can't take it back it has been said. But it is wrong and we need to get back to following rules. If we brake them pay for them. A rape victim has to live with it for the rest of their lives. If one was murdered. I say they would be better off. Then at least the pain is gone. Never forget I counsel children under the age of 13 whom have gone through this terrible terrible ordeal. And to toss all of this under a rug for me is not happening. I won't be back on this subject because it is up close and very personal. I will say. He should of told that woman after he felt he was getting involved. NOT TWO YEARS LATER. And he deserves to go back to prison. Thank you for listening. It may not be what you expected, I am certainly not like your other readers. I generally always stand alone and that's ok by me. But I do speak from my heart. RIGHT OR WRONG. If I am wrong. I will be the first to admit it.
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I respect your opinion, Shyloh, and you make some points I agree with. My grandson was shaken as a baby and has cerebral palsy as a result. Almost six years later, he still has great dificulty walking and talking. When the creep who did it to him got ten years in prison, I felt like that wasn't nearly enough - my grandson will have to live with this forever. I admire that you are passionate about defending the defenseless.
But I do believe in redemption. It was hard for me to reach this point, but I believe that when the asshole who did it gets out, he deserves a chance to prove himself - and if he is changed and doesn't commit any violence or crime for five years, I don't think it would be right to put him back in prison for not telling someone he was locked up.
I would have no trouble giving the guy a life sentence for shaking my grandson. That is a serious crime that deserves a serious punishment. But I would not think it right, no matter how much I despise the creep and how much hs crime still affects my family and grandson, to put him in prison for not telling someone he was in prison. Lock his ass up for his crime - not for some bullshit that might not have been right but was not a crime.
In this case, I suppose we'll just have to agree to disagree.
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small minds suck big time.
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Indeed.... Thanks, Smith!
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I think there is a difference between having rules and having unreasonable ones. And there is nothing wrong with speaking out and saying that the rules that are made are unreasonable.
I may be stretching this but... it would be similar to civil rights... was it fair to treat blacks differently than whites?? there were rules there too.. but people eventually spoke up against them ..because they were unfair. They weren't right.
I don't believe any one here wishes chlidren or anyone else to be unprotected from sexual assault or child predators. I don't think that is what is being said here at all.
I think the laws for those who have served time for sexual assault... guilty or not.. are unfair. Pure and simple..
A murder does not have to tell you he killed someone in cold blood... I feel that personally is far worse. So why these harsh rules for this particular crime.
And yes, John is aware of the rules because he had to live under them.. what would be unusual about that... there is no deviousness in that.
Anyway.. thanks for playing devil's advocate but I think you are playing it in the wrong ballpark.
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I guess once labeled a sex offender, always a sex offender whether in prison, on parole, off parole or in a nursing home. It wasn't the rule that put him back behind bars it was the ex-girlfriend wasn't it? Where is she now? Where is your ex so-called victim? Where are all these lovely girls who put men in jail for nothing? Where is Monica Lewinsky and the thousands of Jewish girls who were murdered and raped by the Nazis in the holocaust and all those girls who have really been raped and all the women who cry every night and even the girl I knew who was raped by a policeman who went scot free. Shame on a justice system that believes lies and believes they have rules that fit the crime. Believe in the Innocence Project and have at least some hope for those who are in jail.. They don't take cases once on parole, however. I found that one out the hard way.
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Thanks for your comment, Elena. I apologize for taking so long to respond to everyone's comments - I wasn't expecting this many. I'm not complaining, though; I'm very grateful.
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I feel for your friend. The legal system is not fair for everyone. My cousin is finding that out as he has been in jail awaiting trial for over 16 months on trumped up charges.
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OK forget the "bad girl" stuff I mentioned. Just finished "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil." There are some really interesting true stories in this non fictional saga. There are bad boys and bad girls and gay people everywhere. We all must get used to this. I have....
Really sorry about your dear friend.
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Thank you, Judi! Sorry to hear about your cousin....
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I very much appreciate your comment, Will! Hope you don't mind that I copied it from my Facebook "wall" to here.... Peace!
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Ah, the tales I could tell and the sorrow I could share. Not here, not now. My mood is mellow and for a bipolar person that is good. My experience in the realm we share here is exhausting. Let me just share that I am a convicted felon. Persecuted for not following the rules that were never told me. The Social Security frowns on stuff like that and even though I had every receipt they requested--it didn't matter. The FBI said there was no case---didn't matter. I am here to tell you that if persecutors want you--they will get you. Some how.
Does it bother me to tell I am a convicted felon? Yes, because as a degreed college graduate (AS in Criminal Justice), my studies force me to see the stigma created by the words CONVICTED FELON. When the label is sounded, the ears grow deaf. That is how it is. Accept it or die.
Should you fight it if your number comes up? Hell yeah! If I wouldn't have had that pesky nervous breakdown in court (after MY attorney told me that if I took this thing to trail the judge planned to give me 5 years in Marysville), I would've had the strength to get a new PD and who knows what would have happened...Looking at my four grandsons, I couldn't take the chance.
I really didn't want to get into why I absolutely HATE the thing that I had previously loved and hoped to help change. It reeks of the stink of corruption. Personally, I don't know how people can be part of such corruption and be able to tuck their kids in at night.
I have also known some sex offenders, JC, and know how little it takes to be pulled into that rushing treadmill. Good luck to your friend. To the onlookers, moniter what comes out of your mouth, everything comes back 3 fold.
As for me, it cut me down (the court business)for a minute, but there are more ways than one to skin a cat.
The best revenge is a life well lived.--CK
You can catch my latest blog (which is not about any of this) at www.angelfire.com/oh3/christinakiplinger/blog
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Wow... your comment blew me away. I admire your courage in sharing this - and I think you expressed so many things so very well. Sad to admit, but before my "misfortune" I believed that everyone who went to prison deserved to be there, that the justice system rarely failed, that a jury would never find you guilty and a judge would never sentence you if you hadn't committed a crime, and that the rules were always designed primarily for our protection (not out of political expediency or to perpetuate the system). But I was a bit naïve. Sure, there are a lot of folks working in the system who do care about fairness, justice and rehabilitation. My wife is one. So was my father, before his retirement. But you can't away from the fact that if the system rehabilitates every felon successfully, there will be thousands of case workers, corrections officers, prosecutors, defense attorneys, police officers, judges, psychologists, et cetera out of work (half the work force in some small Ohio locales would be unemployed).
Thanks, Christina! And I'm looking forward to checking out your latest blog.
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Good questions, Kathy.... The state is on one hand investing in Re-Entry programs and on the other hand doing things that make it harder for ex-cons (especially sex offenders) to successfully re-enter society as productive, fully-contributing citizens. I've been honest with potential employers and some have hired me only to "unhire" me when the person who hired me's boss found out about it. One time, the rule that my employer's name and address must be published on the sex offender website deterred a company from giving me job. But I've tried to view this as an opportunity as much as an obstacle. It's given me much more time to focus on creative endeavors - and I've been fortunate enough have a supportive family to pick up the financial slack while I establish myself. Not all ex-cons are so lucky.
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I'm very sorry to hear about your friend. We live in a society of people and we need to understand that the people who serve time in prison are going to re-enter society and we would all be better served if they were given the opportunity to re-establish themselves. It is in the best interest of society to encourage and not deter these people from resuming normal lives. It's not the ex-convict that I fear. It's the person who has been stripped of everything and has nothing left to lose.
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Thanks, Tara! I very much agree with you.
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I am so sorry to hear about your friend and pissed that his ex basically turned him in because your friend wouldn't give in to his extortion attempts--too bad something can't be done about THAT situation too!
But it just goes to show that anyone with any sort of stigma associated with their name or reputation is susceptible to unscrupulous bastards like this guy's ex-boyfriend.
I don't really blame him for not telling this guy about his past but do know from past experience of finding out about a lover's ex-convict status and sex offender label that it does need to be said and it's best if it comes from the lover and not from some other possible source.
I can't even imagine what it must feel like to have to tell someone you think you could come to care for that you have been convicted of a crime of this nature (putting aside all accusations and assertions and allegations of innocence and guilt because once you are convicted or even accused, it's with you for life, isn't it?)
Not even circumstances matter because the label is there in bright flashing neon letters and that person you're telling is surely going to run for the hills as fast as his or her little feet will carry them.
So, maybe in a way, telling that person is a good test of character. If they don't run too far or they run and come back, then they may be worth having as a friend or lover. Maybe you wouldn't want them anyway if they would be the kind of person who would call your parole officer when they found out you didn't tell them about your time in prison and didn't want to get back together with them or loan them money any more. (I had a hard time imagining an ex-girlfriend doing that but when I read it was an ex-boyfriend it wasn't such a big leap of imagination.)
But I think that your approach of putting your past out in the open for everyone to see is also a very good way to handle the situation. It's honest and people can take it or leave as they please. You don't dwell on it or whine about it or deny it. There are lots of other interesting things in your life and you go with it. And I admire that.
Can't wait to see what you post next. Keep up the good works...
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Thank you, Pinky! Welcome to my blog - and I very much appreciate you sharing whaat you have. Peace...
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I am trying to figure out what I have learned from this blog and the many comments. All I understand from it is that it is criminal action worthy of jail time NOT to tell someone with whom you have had a relationship that you have spent time in prison. That is really a horrible crime and worthy of spending more time in prison. It isn't exactly a lie but it is withholding information. Geeze, what a wonderful system we have going to PROTECT OUR CHILDREN from RAPISTS AND PREDATORS!!
I guess your friend will now have to be rehabilitated from withholding information and should wear a badge telling everyone who he is. Something like a large A on his chest or a Jew badge in Germany or Spain during the Inquisition. Who makes these "rules" anyhow??
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the RULES is made by the Government
and the Government is ruled by mammon
Money in the paycheck
Money in the pocket
The Distinguishing Mark is 666 and it is coming soon to a town near ewe the dividing factor between GOD and his people is not nothing but a new number tattooe painted on head or forehand eye believe it will be worse than Nazi ever could??? The people in the jail are not your enemies. We as Christians are supposed to "Remember the Prisoners" at least in Prayers. A new time is coming when everyone will be criminals and the GOOD people put to sleep. ^^^666^^^
http://poetrypoem.com/cgi-bin/index.pl?poemnumber=889126&sitename=charlax&password=&poemoffset=0&displaypoem=t&item=poetry
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It all seems very wrong. I'm glad your friend is in good spirits. The lack of common sense in the way that the law is administered just...baffles me....best wishes for your friend.
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Thank you very much, Theresa!
Hope you're enjoying Nashville... I just noticed you've posted a blog from there, and I'm eager to check it out.
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