John caves in to peer pressure and Googles "John Needs"
I've no time to write a real blog today - I've a million things to do at home, and then I'm co-hosting Lix and Kix at the 806 at 7 p.m. I'll be back in the next coupla days with some real blogs, including video from a great night of poetry in Toledo a week ago and photos from another great night of poetry at the Literary Cafe last Thursday. Meanwhile, here's something silly I posted on Facebook yesterday, which resulted in at least a hundred often very funny comments. Maybe if no one minds, I'll copy folks' comments here when I have a moment later today.
Google “[your first name] needs” and share the first 10 results. That's it: it is that simple. But be honest! Tag the person who tagged you, and pass it on...
Here are my unadulterated results:
1. Oct 16, 2005 ... All you do is Google the phrase, “your first name needs” (as in John needs) and put the first ten entries in your blog. [You mean this has been going around since 2005? I just caught the caboose of the train.]
2. Big Bad John Needs a Hug. [I'm not big, not bad - but can I still have the hug?]
3. John Needs Help Ask John. [I get by with a little help from my friends - even if that was Ringo and not John.]
4. John needs 13 bottles of water from the store. John can only carry 3 at a time. What is the minimum number of trips John needs to make? [Little known fact - at one point in my life I was a mathematics major - seriously.]
5. John Needs Joe, Now More than Ever. [Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand?]
6. Elton John Needs Rest After Throat Surgery. [I guess that's why they call it the blues.]
7. Not EVERY John needs a plumber. [Hear that, Joe?!?!]
8. Don John needs charisma. [Charisma's not another plumber, is she?]
9. John needs to embrace family values. Pat Robertson's been reading.... [Quit confusing me with McCain, dammit! What is this, a vast right-wing conspiracy?]
10. Fort St. John needs workers—no experience required. [And here I had no clue any fort had named me its saint. Did Pat - or Joe - or Charisma, for that matter - have anything to do with it?]
Here are my unadulterated results:
1. Oct 16, 2005 ... All you do is Google the phrase, “your first name needs” (as in John needs) and put the first ten entries in your blog. [You mean this has been going around since 2005? I just caught the caboose of the train.]
2. Big Bad John Needs a Hug. [I'm not big, not bad - but can I still have the hug?]
3. John Needs Help Ask John. [I get by with a little help from my friends - even if that was Ringo and not John.]
4. John needs 13 bottles of water from the store. John can only carry 3 at a time. What is the minimum number of trips John needs to make? [Little known fact - at one point in my life I was a mathematics major - seriously.]
5. John Needs Joe, Now More than Ever. [Hey Joe, where you going with that gun in your hand?]
6. Elton John Needs Rest After Throat Surgery. [I guess that's why they call it the blues.]
7. Not EVERY John needs a plumber. [Hear that, Joe?!?!]
8. Don John needs charisma. [Charisma's not another plumber, is she?]
9. John needs to embrace family values. Pat Robertson's been reading.... [Quit confusing me with McCain, dammit! What is this, a vast right-wing conspiracy?]
10. Fort St. John needs workers—no experience required. [And here I had no clue any fort had named me its saint. Did Pat - or Joe - or Charisma, for that matter - have anything to do with it?]
Maybe I shoulda done this as Jesus instead of as John. 
the internet needs to stop this silly chain letter shit.
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I tend to avoid them - in fact, I avoided this one for about a month before caving in after two dozen "tags." All work and no play makes John a dull boy. And it ended up being a lot of harmless fun. But that's no guarantee I won't avoid the next two dozen I receive.
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This is a non-blog blog. When you are" too busy preparing for a program tonight" at Lix & Kix ... sort of blog.
Unfortunately.. these silly things are fun to do Steve... we are all guilty of participating. Thank goodness they often have a short shelf life and run their course in a matter of a short time when people finally have their fill.
In the meantime... the silliness has been very fruitful for me.. it's gotten my mind in a different space.. so it's gotten me writing again.... with new ideas bubbling up. So I won't condemn the practice since I've gotten something out of it.
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Frankly, I've done all the preparing for tonight I'm going to do. I can't practice music. My sprained wrist isn't bothering me at the moment, as long as I keep my hand relaxed - but if I practice the keyboard or guitar, it'll be bothering me by the time I finish one song - and once it starts, it takes a while to go away. So we'll just see how it goes. But as far as mental preparation, I will be doing some of that - as well as some housework that doesn't require too much use of my left hand. I need to fill out a poet's survey for some grad student at Ohio State. And of course a bunch of us are meeting for dinner at the Thai Bistro before Lix....
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I'm sure you can do something creative with that thought and if you don't Dianne surely will... LOL....
googly eyes.
Why do you need so much water? To practice walking upon, Mr. Crisis? LMAO!!
Okay, he was Vaginally Impaired
Ya'll have been into the sacrificial wine, haven't ya?
Hahahahahaha!!!
John has a thing about plumbers named Joe
Susan A. "did" Jesus
Jesus was also "Googled"
Jesus only walks on bottled water lately (please note that Dasani has salt added, which also helps with buoyancy - not sure what it does for girlancy)
His holiness lacks a hole
Mandi has "penis" issues
Christina is passing out the wine
and Susan R-T quit while she was a "head"
If they're small, but them in a bag, or a backpack, or even a wagon.
If they're large, like gallon jugs, how do you carry three? If you can carry two in one hand, wouldn't the limit would be 4?
So why make extra trips? Bring some friends along. Borrow Mom's car. Hire a taxi.
I'm pretty sure the "intended" answer here is 5 (lol) but anyone dumb enough to make five trips to the store for water may also walk back to the store with a bottle or two, which of course could make the answer different.
Kurt needs to come over and discuss philosophical questions on my page...
Gawd is in the timing!
Oh, and there's nothing you'll find to not love about Kurt. You can tell he really thought that through
1 Jesus Needs your money
2 Jesus needs new PR
3 Baby Jesus needs extra security from thieves
4. Jesus Phone needs an exorcist
5 Jesus Needs a Donkey Mark 11:3.
6 Jesus needs shampoo .
7 Jesus needs Ritalin
8 Jesus needs a drink.
9 Baby (Jesus) needs a new pair of wings?
10 Jesus needs a better marketing team
Well.. I see why he wasn't getting any
I was just thinking it would be funny to do a separate note just for him!!
Wholly Merry
Mother of Dog
The Horde is With Thee
Breasted Art Tao
Among Women
and Blistered
is thy Fruit of the Loom
Jaysus
Suite Merry
Mother of Dog
Prey for us Sinners
Now
and at the Our of Hour Debt
AMEN
I say "Oh my dog" all the time!!
(Sit Ubu sit.. good dog)
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http://i216.photobucket.com/albums/cc48/charlaxici/Saturday/JesusCrisus.jpg
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Math rocks! I used to tutor Physics. I love Calculus and Prob/Stat!
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Btw, happy belated square root day! It was yesterday (03.03.09).
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